The Four Bones of a Transformational Speech

Cultural anthropologist Angeles Arrien, author of The Four-Fold Way, teaches there are four bones to which we must pay attention if we are to remain fully present in our lives. As in life, so it is in speaking! Here are the four bones:

1. First, the wishbone. That is where our vision resides, the place of dreaming and re-dreaming so that we live the life we came to live. When you’re developing your presentation, what is the vision you hold of what is possible because you choose to show up? A transformational speech begins with knowing the new story you want people to embrace and act upon. So exercise your wishbone as your very first step to a transformational speech. What is the outcome you wish for that makes all the energy of preparing and delivering a presentation worthwhile?

2. The second bone is the backbone. Taking action in support of our dreams requires courage and strength. The call to action you put forth in your speaking is the backbone – it first represents your own backbone, the bravery to ask for something worthy of a better story. Then you call forth the backbone of the audience when you challenge them to leave the room with a commitment to a personal step toward an action that will make the new story possible. Just one step; ask them for that without apology or equivocation.

3. The third is the funny bone. It is said that laughter is the shortest distance between two people. It is perennial wisdom in professional speaking circles that, “You don’t have to be funny to speak; only to get paid for it!”

4. Then there’s the hollow little bone. This bone is likely the most challenging for a speaker who needs a strong ego to show up in the first place – and then get out of the way. To be a “hollow bone” requires that we acknowledge our doubts and fears and reluctance and do the work to heal the personal wounds that cause us to question our callings and capacities. Only then can we be “hollow” enough to make room for something more powerful than a carefully crafted speech to flow through us and out to others. When we recognize that ultimately our speaking is in support of our message and not about us, we open the hollow bone to hope and possibility and to receive grand support for a worthy mission. We experience an energetic surge when the hollow little bone is an open channel for truth to be spoken in the moment.

When your wishbone, your backbone, your funny bone and the hollow little bone are acknowledged and expressed, you’re well on your way to presenting the speech you were born to give to the audience you are destined to serve. To be a transformational speaker, remember the Four Bones!

 

2 Responses to The Four Bones of a Transformational Speech

A Word From Our Clients

Description: Hear from Danielle LaPorte, Michael Hart, Jennifer Louden, Susan Hyatt, Dr. Diane Chung, Julie Daley and Dyana Valentine.

Gail’s Book & Audio Book!

Applause!

"My publisher Harper Collins referred me to develop my speaking skills, and I ended up with a life-changing experience. It transformed my whole experience of speaking from enduring it to really enjoying it."
MARGARET PAUL. Ph.D
Inner Bonding

Our Next Available Program

Transformational Speaking Immersion
Santa Fe, NM, USA

To get started right away, join our online academy.

See Complete Calendar

Follow me!TwitterFacebookLinkedinBlog Categories</h3> </div><div class="art-blockcontent"> <div class="art-blockcontent-cc"></div> <div class="art-blockcontent-body"><a href="https://twitter.com/gaillarsen" target="_blank"><img src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/social-profiles-widget/assets/images/default/Twitter_48x48.png" alt="Twitter" /></a><a href="https://www.facebook.com/transformationalspeaking" target="_blank"><img src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/social-profiles-widget/assets/images/default/Facebook_48x48.png" alt="Facebook" /></a><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/gaillarsen" target="_blank"><img src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/social-profiles-widget/assets/images/default/Linkedin_48x48.png" alt="Linkedin" /></a><form action="https://realspeaking.com" method="get"><label class="screen-reader-text" for="cat">Blog Categories</label><select name='cat' id='cat' class='postform'> <option value='-1'>Select Category</option> <option class="level-0" value="5">1 Calling All Voices</option> <option class="level-0" value="7">2 The Heart of Speaking</option> <option class="level-0" value="8">3 The Art of Speaking</option> <option class="level-0" value="9">4 The Energetics of Speaking</option> <option class="level-0" value="10">5 The Business of Speaking</option> <option class="level-0" value="1">6 Can’t Help Myself Commentary</option> </select> </form> <script type="text/javascript"> /* <![CDATA[ */ (function() { var dropdown = document.getElementById( "cat" ); function onCatChange() { if ( dropdown.options[ dropdown.selectedIndex ].value > 0 ) { dropdown.parentNode.submit(); } } dropdown.onchange = onCatChange; })(); /* ]]> */ </script> <div class="cleared"></div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"></div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"></div> <div class="cleared"></div> </div> </div> <div class="art-footer"> <div class="art-footer-t"></div> <div class="art-footer-body"> <div class="art-content-layout"> <div class="art-content-layout-row"> <div class="art-layout-cell art-layout-cell-size4"> <div class="art-center-wrapper"> <div class="art-center-inner"> <div class="art-widget widget widget_categories" id="categories-2"><h5 class="art-widget-title">Categories</h5><div class="art-widget-content"> <ul> <li class="cat-item cat-item-5"><a href="https://realspeaking.com/category/calling-all-voices/">1 Calling All Voices</a> </li> <li class="cat-item cat-item-7"><a href="https://realspeaking.com/category/the-heart-of-speaking/">2 The Heart of Speaking</a> </li> <li class="cat-item cat-item-8"><a href="https://realspeaking.com/category/the-art-of-speaking/">3 The Art of Speaking</a> </li> <li class="cat-item cat-item-9"><a href="https://realspeaking.com/category/the-energetics-of-speaking/">4 The Energetics of Speaking</a> </li> <li class="cat-item cat-item-10"><a href="https://realspeaking.com/category/the-business-of-speaking/">5 The Business of Speaking</a> </li> <li class="cat-item cat-item-1"><a href="https://realspeaking.com/category/cant-help-myself-commentary/">6 Can't Help Myself Commentary</a> </li> </ul> </div></div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"> </div> </div> <div class="art-layout-cell art-layout-cell-size4"> <div class="art-center-wrapper"> <div class="art-center-inner"> <div class="art-widget widget widget_recent_entries" id="recent-posts-3"><h5 class="art-widget-title">Recent Blog Posts</h5><div class="art-widget-content"> <ul> <li> <a href="https://realspeaking.com/books-list-2023/">Books by Transformational Speakers 2023</a> </li> <li> <a href="https://realspeaking.com/emergence/">An emergence story for these times … and all of time</a> </li> <li> <a href="https://realspeaking.com/birthing-the-new-story-imagining-a-world-that-works-for-all-of-life/">Birthing the New Story! Imagining a World that Works for All of Life</a> </li> <li> <a href="https://realspeaking.com/4-ways-to-work-with-gail/">4 Ways to Work with Gail</a> </li> <li> <a href="https://realspeaking.com/its-holy-fools-day-lets-ditch-deadlines-and-grab-the-lifelines/">It’s Holy Fools Day! Let’s Ditch Deadlines and Grab the Lifelines</a> </li> <li> <a href="https://realspeaking.com/a-new-rhythm-for-new-times/">A new rhythm for new times</a> </li> </ul> </div></div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"> </div> </div> <div class="art-layout-cell art-layout-cell-size4"> <div class="art-center-wrapper"> <div class="art-center-inner"> <div class="art-widget widget widget_archive" id="archives-2"><h5 class="art-widget-title">Blog Archives</h5><div class="art-widget-content"> <label class="screen-reader-text" for="archives-dropdown-2">Blog Archives</label> <select id="archives-dropdown-2" name="archive-dropdown"> <option value="">Select Month</option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2024/01/'> January 2024 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2021/10/'> October 2021 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2020/11/'> November 2020 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2020/10/'> October 2020 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2020/03/'> March 2020 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2019/04/'> April 2019 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2018/08/'> August 2018 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2018/04/'> April 2018 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2017/06/'> June 2017 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2016/12/'> December 2016 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2015/09/'> September 2015 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2015/03/'> March 2015 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2014/10/'> October 2014 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2014/02/'> February 2014 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2013/07/'> July 2013 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2013/03/'> March 2013 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2012/04/'> April 2012 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2012/03/'> March 2012 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2012/01/'> January 2012 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2011/03/'> March 2011 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2010/11/'> November 2010 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2010/08/'> August 2010 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2010/07/'> July 2010 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2010/05/'> May 2010 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2009/11/'> November 2009 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2009/10/'> October 2009 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2009/08/'> August 2009 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2009/06/'> June 2009 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2009/03/'> March 2009 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2009/01/'> January 2009 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2008/12/'> December 2008 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2008/11/'> November 2008 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2008/01/'> January 2008 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2007/08/'> August 2007 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2007/05/'> May 2007 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2007/04/'> April 2007 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2007/03/'> March 2007 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2006/12/'> December 2006 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2006/10/'> October 2006 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2006/07/'> July 2006 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2005/03/'> March 2005 </option> <option value='https://realspeaking.com/2004/04/'> April 2004 </option> </select> <script type="text/javascript"> /* <![CDATA[ */ (function() { var dropdown = document.getElementById( "archives-dropdown-2" ); function onSelectChange() { if ( dropdown.options[ dropdown.selectedIndex ].value !== '' ) { document.location.href = this.options[ this.selectedIndex ].value; } } dropdown.onchange = onSelectChange; })(); /* ]]> */ </script> </div></div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"> </div> </div> <div class="art-layout-cell art-layout-cell-size4"> <div class="art-center-wrapper"> <div class="art-center-inner"> <div class="art-widget widget widget_search" id="search-3"><h5 class="art-widget-title">Search This Site</h5><div class="art-widget-content"> <form method="get" name="searchform" action="https://realspeaking.com/"> <div class="search"> <input name="s" type="text" value="" style="width: 95%;" /> <span class="art-button-wrapper"> <span class="art-button-l"> </span> <span class="art-button-r"> </span> <input class="art-button" type="submit" name="search" value="Search" /> </span> </div> </form> </div></div><div class="art-widget widget widget_text" id="text-6"><div class="art-widget-content"> <div class="textwidget"></br> <a href="https://feeds.feedburner.com/TruthWellSpoken" title="Subscribe to my feed" rel="alternate" type="application/rss+xml"><img src="https://www.feedburner.com/fb/images/pub/feed-icon32x32.png" alt="" style="border:0"/></a><a href="https://feeds.feedburner.com/TruthWellSpoken" title="Subscribe to my feed" rel="alternate" type="application/rss+xml">Subscribe to Gail's Blog</a></br> </br> </div> </div></div><div class="art-widget widget widget_text" id="text-2"><h5 class="art-widget-title">Contact Gail</h5><div class="art-widget-content"> <div class="textwidget">Phone: 1-505-986-8650<br /> <a href="https://realspeaking.com/contact/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Contact Form</a><br /> Located in Santa Fe, New Mexico <br/> USA</div> </div></div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="art-footer-center"> <div class="art-footer-wrapper"> <div class="art-footer-text"> <p><a href="https://realspeaking.com">Home</a> | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/training/transformationalspeakingimmersion/">The Training</a> | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/transformationalspeaking/">The Book</a> | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/ravereviewsgaillarsen/rave-review/">Rave Reviews</a> | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/gaillarsen/">Gail's Story</a> | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/blog/">Blog</a> | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/media/">Media</a> | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/contact/">Connect</a></p> <p>Copyright © 2024. All Rights Reserved. Website powered by <a href="https://designsimplex.com" target="_blank">Design Simplex LLC</a>.<br /> Real Speaking is a registered trademark | <a href="https://realspeaking.com/privacy">Privacy Policy</a><BR> Real Speaking LLC is a limited liability corporation registered in the state of New Mexico.<BR> <p>  </p> <div class="cleared"></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="cleared"></div> </div> </div> </div> <div id="wp-footer"> <a id="FollowMeTabRightSm" onClick="showFollowMe()" href="#" style="border-bottom:none;"><img src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/rightsm.gif" border="0" /></a> <div id="FollowMeBubbleBG" style="visibility:hidden;"></div> <div id="FollowMeBubble" style="visibility:hidden;border-bottom:none;"> <div class="top" style="background-image:url('https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/followme_top.gif');width:329px;height:60px;float:left;display:block;border-bottom:none;"> <a id="close" onClick="hideFollowMe()" href="#" style="border-bottom:none"><img src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/close.png" border="0" /> </a> <!-- <a id="grab" target="_blank" title="grab this" href="http://www.ignitesocialmedia.com/tools/follow-me/"><span>grab this</span></a>--></div> <div class="mid" style="background-image:url('https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/followme_mid.gif');width:329px;background-repeat:repeat-y;float:left;"> <div id="stretch"> <span><a title="Facebook" target="_blank" href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/Transformational-Speaking/189305358912 " rel="me"><img width="32px" src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/facebook.png" border="0" alt="Facebook" /> Facebook</a></span> <span><a title="Twitter" target="_blank" href="https://twitter.com/gaillarsen" rel="me"><img width="32px" src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/twitter.png" border="0" alt="Twitter" /> Twitter</a></span> <span><a title="Youtube" target="_blank" href="https://www.youtube.com/gaillarsen1" rel="me"><img width="32px" src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/youtube.png" border="0" alt="Youtube" /> Youtube</a></span> <span><a title="LinkedIn" target="_blank" href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/gaillarsen" rel="me"><img width="32px" src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/linkedin.png" border="0" alt="LinkedIn" /> LinkedIn</a></span> <span><a title="RSS" target="_blank" href="https://realspeaking.com/feed" rel="me"><img width="32px" src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/rss.png" border="0" alt="RSS" /> RSS</a></span> </div></div> <div class="bottom" style="background-image:url('https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/followme_bottom.gif');height:34px;width:329px;clear:both;float:left;"> <a id="grab" target="_blank" title="grab this" style="border-bottom:none;" href="http://www.ignitesocialmedia.com/tools/follow-me/"><span>grab this</span></a> </div> <div class="grab" style="width:329px;clear:both;float:left;"><a style="border-bottom:none;" href="http://www.ignitesocialmedia.com/tools/follow-me/"><img src="https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/follow-me/images/followme_grab.gif" /></a></div> </div> <link rel='stylesheet' id='cvg-styles-css' href='https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/cool-video-gallery/css/cvg-styles.css?ver=6.2.5' type='text/css' media='all' /> <link rel='stylesheet' id='jquery.fancybox-css' href='https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/cool-video-gallery/third_party_lib/fancybox_1.3.4/jquery.fancybox-1.3.4.css?ver=6.2.5' type='text/css' media='all' /> <script type='text/javascript' src='https://realspeaking.com/wp-includes/js/comment-reply.min.js?ver=6.2.5' id='comment-reply-js'></script> <script type='text/javascript' src='https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/page-links-to/dist/new-tab.js?ver=3.3.6' id='page-links-to-js'></script> <script type='text/javascript' id='flagscript-js-extra'> /* <![CDATA[ */ var FlaGallery = {"ajaxurl":"https:\/\/realspeaking.com\/wp-admin\/admin-ajax.php","nonce":"2a780e3dc8","license":"","pack":""}; /* ]]> */ </script> <script type='text/javascript' src='https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/flash-album-gallery/assets/script.js?ver=6.0.2' id='flagscript-js'></script> <script type='text/javascript' src='https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/cool-video-gallery/third_party_lib/jwplayer_7.3.6/jwplayer.js?ver=6.2.5' id='jwplayer-js'></script> <script type='text/javascript' src='https://realspeaking.com/wp-content/plugins/cool-video-gallery/third_party_lib/fancybox_1.3.4/jquery.fancybox-1.3.4.pack.js?ver=6.2.5' id='jquery.fancybox-js'></script> <!-- 123 queries. 0.188 seconds. --> </div><style>#global_body_1 img{display:none;}#button10_1{display:none !important;}#button12_1{display:none !important;}#button13_1{display:block !important;}#button1_1{display:block !important;}#button2_1{display:block !important;}#button5_1{display:block !important;}#button6_1{display:block !important;}#spidervideoplayerhtml5_1{background-color: #ffffff; border: 1px solid #a9a9a9; float: left; list-style-type: none !important; margin-bottom: 10px; padding: 5px;}#button4_1{display:block !important;}#button3_1{display:block !important;}</style> <script> jQuery(document).ready(function(){ jQuery('.video-stream').trigger('pause'); }); </script> </body> </html>